on not abandoning everything

A carved oval tulip platter for the spring studio tour collection — visit all things pottery

How to feel good about the progress you’ve made when you’d like to have made more?

While I’m not entirely sure, I can say that the only decent remedy I’ve found to feeling unsure about the thing want to keep doing but you’re not sure how to keep doing because the doing doesn’t come easily, is to keep doing it regardless.

Of course, I don’t mean working yourself into the ground, but rather, taking the time to find a rhythm that works for you, sticking with it for awhile, adjusting where needed, then repeating as much as is helpful in order to get from A to B (or wherever you’l like to go with it).

For a number of reasons that I won’t list off here, my relationship to creativity has been turbulent, inconsistent, and at times, nonexistent.

This means that in order for me to stick with something that care about, I have to be willing to not hold on too tightly or make too precious or tell myself that I cannot exist without it, because I can.

I know that I’ll be ok when the drive to create wanes and I’m left wanting to toss in the towel and abandon everything. And while I’m all for pivoting and changing our minds, for me, that’s never been the problem. The problem has always been in figuring out how to create in a lasting and supportive and gentle way. In a way that works for me right now, then adjusting as my needs inevitably change, and my relationship to creating changes with it.

As part of this experiment, I’ve made the decision to create and publish my first Youtube video. I chose this medium in part because it’s one that I am already somewhat familiar with, making the picking-up-of not as daunting, also because I know that I’d have fun with it, making me less likely to take it too seriously because while I care about the quality of the content I share, I am not looking to become a paid videographer.

I’m just looking to use videography as a tool for documenting and sharing and celebrating my creative experiments.

So, here it is! Definitely the longest video I’ve ever made. It’s goofy and imperfect but I’m proud of having started, and am already knee deep in filming my second one (to be shared in the latter half of March).

Talk soon,
Chloe

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